2AM

A lil past 2 & I'm comsumed. The wee hours of the morn & u'll haunt me til dawn. I am enflamed, impressed, you've talked me speechless. Aw, The begining w/ all its innocence. I don't want 2 even think it, let alone speak it. I could be your get right and you could be my star bright. Watching over, supporting my steps, protecting my honor but still letting be. Our connection, the chains that will set me free. I am @ a lost for words, can't catch my breath or even think straight. I am pleased to meet you, do have a taste. Tomorrow is not promised, waste not a momemnts time. A lil after 2 and your on my mind. Be us both patient...rush not too soon. Besides, pressure is only good after the swoon. Drenched in the moon. Drunk I am off you. I am sick w/ curiousity. You set spark to a fire that was resting. Now i'm restless and craving the touch. I want it all, everything, yes I would like that very much. Go beyond your limits. Fear not a thing. I am more than a beautiful nightmare, will ride you off to sweet dreams. I am here for the taking, so deny me nothing. I will be your diamond in the rough & your wildest fantacy. Its a lil past 2 & I got you on the brain. Yeah the attraction is crazy but this is insane. Be careful dear lover, label reads "handle w/ care". In return you will never have to look far, i'll always be right there. Dear lover, tell me this, what star did you ride in on? & are capable of loving me for eternity & beyond

Choices

My question originally was why men can't seem 2 treat the black woman right? Why do all men on some level believe the black woman isnt willing 2 go the extra mile for her man? It's believed by men of all ages, body types, religous backgrounds, financial stature, & creed that however smart or beautiful, the black woman lacks a certain skill when it comes to loving their men. Add the label about them all having "bad attitudes," or "aggressive/angry nature," either resulting from environment or natural disposition & man...I feel any being regardless of race can fall victim 2 an agressive or hostile disposition. 1 must first remove the veil of crutch & label. Don't make excuses for yourselves black women, & blame your eye rolling, neck poppin, lip smackin on having grown up in the ghetto or acient years of oppression/abuse. Nor you oppressor with your opinions point & label commanding self respect as a having a "bad attitude." In asking the other to be fair in judgemnet, be concious of how you represent yourself. Take not their labels & defend them or make excuses. Dont give life 2 what is untrue. Ritcheously & humbling dispell their trickery by breathing light n2 what it is the enemy is blind to. So now my question is how will you, black woman in all your glory & splendor undue the cycle of injustice.? How will you break the curse. Simply teach what they do not know. Continue 2 reprsent yourself n a reflection of your true self. Sure more baby mammas are black but they are impregnated by all diff races of men. So black woman...be more selective in whom you give evrything 2. Spend more time n prayer. Meditate on what you pray about. Be not bitter over the cards life has dealt: men who've hurt u, fathers who didn't love u, mothers who didn't teach u...be not victim, rather a triumphant survivor. Maker of anew. Come on ladies let's show em how its done. Get it together girls. As a black women u r not lacking, you've actually got that secret something extra the world could benefit from. Shine

There is Nothing

There shall never rise a morn that I can admit to being cool with the absence of you. Never the day shall unfold that I be fine in the wake of your departure. Scarred me like a tatoo...shot be down with silver bullets. I lay slained...my last breath at you mercy. I cry for you with the one remaining beat of my heart. Distance is trickery...time and space are but illusions. I hear you when you speak not and feel your presemce from afar. You are music and I am art. I am captured by the sorcery, your black magic, peircing. Weakening. Joy breathtaking. Sorrow deafened. My resaon hushed and logic is silenced the same. Your love is animal I wish not to tame, yet I you claim. So we ride, wild and rambunctious like the sea. I live in you and you in me. There is nothing one can say or nothing one can do...i would move mountains...you'd hitch a ride on the moon. I would cross deserts, you'd swim a monsoon. There is nothing from heaven to hell that would allow me to compromise...the taste of your laughter...my reflection in your eyes. We are but one rythym and there is no rhyme or reason. I will weather the storm...from season to season. There is nothing anyone can posses, nor is there any trick of the tongue. We make love amongst the stars...I lady of the moon...him child of the sun

Let's Go

Take my hand and let's go play. Follow me and smile naughtily @ the secrets I whisper in your ear. Tickle me and sneak up on me...breathe sweetly on my neck. Run and hide and watch me search for you. In this secret garden...chase and tag you're it. Love drunk...lust stupid...cupids arrow. Ready, aim, hit. Think I've been struck twice.They were wrong about lightening, you bring the thunder day after day and well into the night. Tagged me in and I got you stuck. Stung, shocked and in a daze. My love is paradise. Come disrobe in the shade. Feel sunshine cover your skin, embrace your entire being. Come let's dance naked in the water. Promise no one can see, spy or peek, & even so...let the world watch as long as they're watchin' you lovin' me. So on that note, let's giv'em a show. I won't be tooo shy if you won't be scared of me. I'll perform above the best of them. We'll allevieate all doubt or question. W/o coy or reservation. Let's go beyond the known. Let's create anew that is all our own. Let us be ritcheous in our passions and our hunger for one another. Let's make it like none before, unlike any other. Let's goto a place in US we created. Let's ride on the wings of the untraveled, journey into a story untold. Let's go & our visit be smooth & limber so that we together as smoke unfurls. Be like the melody, mimick chaos. The hurts sooo good...do keep going. Dear lover of the night...bathe with me in the moon. drink of my flesh...Lets just go and as so, we'll make up the rest

Forget me Not

Take me away. Color me a beautiful place. Paint the portrait that is the pathway to your soul. Build me the bridge that brings me nearer to you heart. Convey with imagery and riddles all the small things that make up you. Reveal to me the blueprint, the map that will guide me in. Tell me once, tell me twice, tell me three times more after that. Then tell me again. Sing me a lullaby, leave clues in your lyrics. Write it amongst the clouds and then spell it out with stars. Hear my plea as it comes from the core. I want to know your depth...then some more. Be not afraid of me wanting to go deeper. Let me in. So softly I knock...is anyone there? My coyest plea...does it fall on deaf ears? Take a chance on me, I won't let you down. Leave a trail, control my steps. Show me what it requires...i am well euipped. Challenge me with all your might. I was made for it. Built tough. -So often we ignore or simply miss out on what is everything we need. If its not right then you won't mind going without. however...we all have that one that we let go. The one that slipped thru the cracks of our wreckless fingertips. I worry not 'bout who I've left or skipped over. Confident am I in my decisions. I live with immediate abandon of any and all regrets. But, I do fret over the hearts I've broken. Time heals all wounds true, but it's not like pain comes with an expiration date. Fairly speaking....the duration of the infliction does not determine the magnitude of devastation. Nor can it be used to measure how long it takes to heal. Each individual is armed with a different weaponary...objectively thinking...no one more prepared for battle than the next. The war raging inside is different from host to host. So be humble to the requets made unto thee. Be it for friendship, love, kindness even the unconcious ones like forgiveness and remembrancce. Actions will always speak louder than words so hear even the silent ones. Be generous. Open your eyes so that you can see. Open your heart so that you can give and receive love

Come sit down

Come sit down and let me play you a song. Come sit down and let the music take you away. Listen beneath the lyrics and pay attention to the ad-libs. Come sit down with me on the kitchen floor. Let's not say a word and touch...just touch. Think back to intimacy. I trace my fingertips over the veins on the back of you hands. I touch my fingertips across your lips and lay kisses all over your face. You smile and your joy I taste. Come sit with me and watch the house change with the sunset. Chased shadows and reflections shift. Come sit down and let me tell you a story about my past. Some secrets I need to reveal. Come listen to me. Hear my heart and judge not. Come sit down and please pay attention...I don't want you to miss anything. I want to share it all...every single piece. Come sit down with me in an empty bath tub, fully dressed...lets laugh and play and chit and chat. Come sit with me and we'll fill it up...while we're sitting in it and are still fully clothed. We'll laugh and talk and be soaked and make love. We'll make a mess...we'll overflow...leave puddles and wet footprints. We'll have to clean it all up but we won't mind. Might do it in silence, just speaking with our eyes. We might do it in silence and play the music loud, only speaking with our smiles. Come sit down and lay your head in my lap. Let me stroke your head and run my fingetips over your eyebrows. Let me lightly stroke your cheek. Come in with a urgency to sweep me in your arms and so softly give me a kiss. Come in and sit down and remember the beginning. Come and sit down, remember how we've grown. Come in and sit down and wipe away my troubles. Come in, guns blazing and tear off all my clothes... come and sit down right by the front door. Come in and let's walk on the kitchen counter tops, let's make love upon the breakfast table and lay on the kitchen table looking at the ceiling fan. Come and sit down...come close to me, hear how my heart cries for you. Understand the voice it speaks. Come sit down and let me take the pain away...come sit down and let me tell you a joke. Come sit down and can we just hold hands. I don't want to talk, just appreciate you in silence. I just want to be next to you. Just want to smell you and breathe you. Come sit down and look and see...I want to show you something. My beauty marks litter all over and they're almost like a constellation. Come sit down and just stare at me...really see me. See thru me. See to my heart. See down to my soul. It speaks to you in a language all its own. Come sit down and let me cook you a meal. Keep me company and tell me all about your day. Come sit down and eat the food I prepared. I made it with these hands, that are small and pudgy. Come in and sit down...Study while I write. Come in a sit down while we each are own laptobs. Click, click, click, click in our own alumni shirts...you got my college on your hat and I got on your school shorts. Come in and tell me every detail about work. Come in and sit down...join me an ommmmm. Come in and sit down and just watch me do it. Come in and assist me with a pose...thanks...now I can do it. Come stand next to me while I wash my hands at the sink. Come stand behind me and run your hands over my hands beneath the running water. Come stand close to me, so close you can feel my heart flutter. Come in and watch me singing loud and dancing to my own beat. Come in and drop your stuff, surprise and tell me to keep going. Or come in and drop your stuff and join in. Come in and find me just being me...come in and be moved in awe by all my beauty. Come in a bare witness to all that is I. Come sit down and pray with me. Let us speak to our Lord...we have so much to tell him...thank him for supplying the words. Come in and let's get dressed for Church. Come and sit down, let us make sweet love. Sweet love, come and sit down. I want to play you a song.

Everything Happens for a Reason

We often times feel like we have been tricked, baited, persued and then left out to dry. Do not feel bad, do not weep. Do not be weary or confused. Understand that it was necessary. You may feel you have endured enough heart ache for one lifetime and yet repeatedly you feel its shattering time and time again. You may feel as if love hates you. This is not true. As a matter of fact, it couldn't be more untrue. There is something you are missing. Some piece of the magical puzzle that you are simply not seeing. Can't find. My advice; search within yourself. The person who baited, tricked, persued may not have been the one you are to be with. Perhaps that person was sent to help you heal. Maybe they were sent to bridge the gap between you and the next one. Perhaps they were sent to teach you something or open your eyes to things you refused to see. Maybe they were sent to loosen you up a bit or help you slow your roll. There is always some good, even when it's all bad. Even when it's lower than low and then beneath that. Even when you are at the bottom of the bottom and then fall under that...someone somewhere is waiting for you to get up and get it together. Someone is waiting for you change clothes and get that dirt off your shoulder. Someone is waiting to bump into you on a corner, ask them for directions; meet you at a friend's cookout. While you sit around sad and in deep deep thought about why this guy doesn't do this and why he doesn't do that; while you ponder over "what happened" and "what changed," "is it me," "what did I do?" Someone is admiring your fabulousness. Someone wonders why you so prim and pretty, is so sad? They see thru your toughness righ to the core of your beautiful soul and eclectic views...someone is confused at the thought of you not being taken. Someone wants to make you smile and make you giggle. Someone wants to protect you from harm. They are watching from a distance. They ponder moving in, but they hear your tears, even as you tuck beneath great shoes and have them hidden behind your facade of perfect makeup and killer outfit. You are so well put together, so cultured, cool and smooth...but there is something there, a few scars, some war wounds. It proves you've lived...some experience there. So cry not, young girl. Someone is waiting to slip and fall and spill their coffee all over your new outfit. They are waiting for you to look up from tripping over the curb and gaze into their eyes. They are waiting to make you smile and help you learn. They are waiting for someone who will not judge or belittle them, rather uplift and support them. They are looking for you. It may take y'all a lifetime to actually connect, but that's ok...We're on HIS schedule...not our own. You may feel that because you endured some pain and struggle, it's all smooth sailing from here. Keep your faith. Smile in the adversity...all is not lost. It may suck, it may hurt. You may "put your gaurds up." It may keep you on your toes for a while but that's ok. What you don't want to do is carry baggage from the past...it interrupts the flow of your future. Be sure to conquer your demons before venturing on new journey. Be sure to clean house before taking on a new conquest. You want not to lose what could be your greatest gift. Surely there will be times when you want to discuss your past. Sometimes you just want to get it out and have a sounding board to just bounce ideas off. Sometimes you need to rant and rave and babble and at those times it's ok if you just want someone to listen. Do not keep concealed what will harm you spirit. Communication is the foundation to any healthy friendship. Be honest, be open. Be willing to listen just as much as you talk and be open to talk just as patient as you are when you listen. It's a two way street. However to do not shade the sun with negativity and despair. Do not be so lost and wrapped up in things you cannot change, and then let those feelings cloud your judgment towards anew. There are pains, strife, trails and turmoil that will shock you. Throw you off you axis. Your mission in life, is to pick up the pieces of your broken heart and keep it moving. Continue to get your mind right and focus not on the negative. Be a believer, be a mover and shaker, be a dreamer. Be whomever your God saw fit for you to be. Fear not love, even when it hurts, especially when it hurts. Someone, somewhere is trying to show you something. Open your eyes to receive it.

Love Tastes Like

Sucking my freshly painted toes and lickin my cum off my fuschia fingertips. We're going round for round. Not stopping til dawn. We're going nonstop, you keep makin me cum. We countin them out 9999, 1000, 10001. And our night has just begun. If they'd told me, I would have never believed, you would be the one. To leave me speechless and spellbound. Took the thrown, now I wearin you crown. And the jewels match my heels. Making love in royal chambers, it's a dream made real. Humbly bow down. To the one whom no one compares. He can travel the earth and I'd have no fear. He can surf the constellations and I'd wait right here. For a King always returns....you runners up, goin head and let it burn. There can only be one. He is the moon, I am the sun. I push his buttons and wear his button ups. With sparkling red lipstick and four inch black pumps. He's won his bride and proved his match. He comes equipped with anything I may lack. I blow his mind, he leaves a trail of kisses down my back. He loves my sounds and loves makin me make them. I crave his aura...I am lost without him. He made me a woman, he epidemises man. I am his world, I give him my hand. In missionary he cradles me. Tucks me tight and kisses me hard. Soft stare in my eyes, one beat between two hearts. He conquers me from behind. He grips my hips and steals my thighs. He talks to me aggresively. He journeys deep within me. I coyly throw it back. Upon my flesh, mixing with his manish moans, you can hear the slaps echoing down the hall. I am his everything, I give him my all

Can I have your Attention Please

Ladies. Has it really gotten to the point where we have to spell it out? I mean give me a break, cut a sista some slack. I understand you guys have gone and gotten touch with your "feminine side" but that's no reason to act like a bunch of pussies. We ladies, yes love being your equals, but for cryin out loud...man up. Life if full of challenges, stop making excuses. Get with the program. We still like a man to be a man. Still want you to climb the highest mountain and cross the freaken desert to cater to our every whim. It's not just the pregnant women who wants you to get up in the middle of the night and get them a fruit cup...or perhaps after sex while we're making you a sandwich, you could, I don't know...get prepped for round two. One less "job" we as ladies will have to do. Of course, you know, this sexy didn't just happen. So maybe while we're getting the kids ready for school or ironing your clothes, you could be somewhere, cutting up the lemon for my water or boiling water for my tea. *sigh* I admire all that you do do. I see and appreciate it. Believe me I do, just read back to "Can the Fellas have the Floor." So it's not you to whom I am speaking. It's the rest of you lames who just can't get right. Just can't get right. I'm goin find that handbook on "How to Date a Goddess" and distribute it to the masses. Stand atop the highest building and make it rain...knowledge!(...wait that's right, I haven't written it yet...but in the meantime I leave you this blog) I am speaking to all those who whine that gas it too high, it ain't getting any cheaper...you live too far, not moving any closer...you're such a priss...so what it's ice on the ground, you will bury in my stilletos. What is going on out there? What are you doing? And what is with all this unavailable bull crap...when I call you come. No questions asked. Just do what I want and there would be no problems. No naggin, no stressing, no fussing. If she is angry with you, ask yourself what you did to disappoint her. If she is throwing dishes, as you run and duck, ponder over what you said that made her behaive that way. Surely there is a reason. Clearly, this well groomed woman would not go poppin off at the lip and flyin off at the mouth if YOUUUUUU had not fueled that fire. Perhaps you didn't do something that she asked of you. tisk tisk tisk...shame on you mister Perhaps you didn't do something that she should NOT have to ask you to do. Compliment her new hair cut, notice her new shoes, wash her car, tell her she's lookin great, the yoga and running is really payin off. Who knows??!!! Y'all are so clueless. The point is figure it out and figure it out fast. You will lose her. I tell you kind sir, just as the sun shines. You will lose her. She will be a favorite memory in the distant wind. She will leave you spellbound, so much so, you'll beg the heavens to send her your way again. But alas, with no luck. Your bride to be, sweet lady in waiting; your fair maiden is gone, for gold she has struck. There is a man out there just waiting and willing to sweep her off her feet. He is eager to take your princess and make her his queen. He is ready to do all the things you will not. He is trained in all the things that leave you stumped and perplexed. He loves her already and while she is busy loving you, he is waiting. Watching as you make one bad judgement call after another. He sees all your mistakes, even ones that slipped her eye. Oh he knows, you smirk a smug look but, he knows. He knows because he is like you. He too, once lost his greatest love to a much better suitor. Sad, but beacuse of it, he knows better. He knows now what it takes, what it actually entales to keep a woman, a real woman satisfied/tamed. He understands, work and God above all. The only difference between you and him, is right after GOD, there is his woman. He is man enough to admit, he would be less of a man without her. Work would be meaningless if he wasn't working to better their lives, spoil her, protect her. I his eyes she can do no wrong. I his heart, nothing is unforgivable and he denies her nothing. Gives her, everything. Her every want, fulfilled. Before she even has to ask. He does it all and then does some more. He meets her desires and then surpasses the expectations. So y'all keep spending all dat time with your boys. Y'all keep on being too busy. Don't say ne' word when you finally take a moment to look up and notice that she is gone. Sad part about that is, y'all so self absorbed you won't even notice right away. It may take a lil while, but trust, keep on and uh uh uh...you'll see nothing but a trail of stilleto prints. We're far too busy for dear john letters (all that writing/typing is compromising to our nail polish), but you can check her mood on myspace;)

Just Like That

When you aren't looking. When you least expect it. When you realize you should be careful, for you heart's desire may be tomorrow pleasurs. Sometimes you feel all is lost and your heart is breaking. "When you are down to nothing, know that God is up to something." Everything happens for a reason. Fate sometimes has a very interesting sense of humour. Yet humourous, never the less. It's never ceases to amaze me; the way we can want for something or someone so badly it aches inside. You grow weak and can't resist them. They have some sort of spell or power over you. You buckle at the sound of their voice or the way they take a breath. You can feel the sexy from locking eyes at a crowded function or from across the room. Your souls call out to eachother no matter what the distance. Sometimes you think you know what you are supposed to be doing and who you should be doing it with. When in actuality, we know not. The day is never promised. All we can do is live conciously and couragously. Live not in fear nor in stupidity. And so with that. Ever the cool walking along. Minding my own business. Just chilling you know, being worried about not a thing in the world. Against all odds, despite the trying circumstances, joy radiates. For being so greatful, great things continue to happen. I have made new friends, seen new places. I have done things and accomplished more than I ever saw for myself. And just when I thought, I was losing my mojo and or perhaps things were attempting to take a turn for the worse, bammmmmmmm!!! Just like that. Out of no where. There you were. So here I am and off we go. This should be fun. Don't be too scared of me and I won't be shy with you. You couldn't resist and neither could I. You flicked a switch, hit a nerve, struck a cord when we locked eyes. I can feel you before you ever touched me, heard you words yell out to me from the silence inside. Where this goes, only time will tell...Im scrappin the rules and you've tossed out the labels. What needs not to be defined. I keep replaying those last moments with you, again and again in my mind. You weren't expecting me to show up and I wasn't thinking about you. You couldn't resist my sexy and now look us two. Tearing up the walls and grippin on the bed. Nails dug in your back, eyes roll in my head. Flip, twist, toss, smack and flip again. My homie, my lover, my man and best friend. You greet me with hugs and say goodbye with kisses. You fulfilled my every fantacy, who needs three wishes. When you found me, it was kismet. There was nothing left to say. Just like that, just out of the blue...on that warm summer day. I like how you like me and I like how we play. I like your chivalry and your courtship is more than up to parr. You made love to me all evening, until the light of the morning star. And even then it don't cease. I was made for you and you were sent for me.

Just For Smiles

She got you trippin. You got her playin her love songs again. She's off turning the blues; on turning the soul. She got you twisted. You're frozen. Stuck in time, can't see past her light. She is everything you hoped for and everything you never expected. She is your favorite dream and everything you didn't imagine. You got her playin it on repeat...got her doing naughty things. You put her up in your ride and adjust back her seat. You trying not to notice how cute she is, even down to her feet. But you just want to suck on her cute lil toes. Andy you told yourself you weren't going down that road. She got you sprung and you got her open. She is your flower blossoming before you very eyes. Soft as peddles and pure as rain. She is at your side, she is sharing your name. She is wearing your ring. She is having you children and cooking your meals. Y'all got matching tattoos and an unbreakable bond. You put her up in a house and keep jewels on her arm. She represents you real proper like. On a pedestal you've placed her most high. Ever the diva, ever unique. Always a lady, lil miss party priss in the streets. Dancing under the moonlight. She keeps you in her pocket. You just want to live inside. The sweetest place you've ever known on earth. The sweetest surrender rest within her. She is the joy and peace, the moment of weakness and the strength. She is the story and you are the end. You can hear giggles under every word she speaks. She is wearing your happiness, from the crown of the head, to the souls of her feet. She makes her own money and makes your toes curl. She does her own thang, this worldly girl. She is your pin up girl, your runway model, your muse and your supreme being. She can be a million miles away and still caged in your heart. She is private dancer, he is your very own personal porn star. For you and you alone, she cooks, cleans and can even knows how to work to the pole. You give her in return the greatest love never known. Never spoke of, never written. You out there buying up the world and deliver her on a platter. You are at her every beck and call, drop of a dime, on a wind. One has taken a lover. She blessings your food and you build her a bigger house. You give more children, more to smile about.

She

She is looking every bit the part. She is playing her position. She has moved in gracefully. She has taken over, humbly. Quietly and patiently. She is time; moving as swift as the seasons. She can make the waters come and she can change the colors. She is the breeze so sweet as she blows kisses. She is the keeper of thunder and muse to the artists. She warms the souls of the masses. She is rhyme without reason, she is the lyric. She is the goddess Phoenix. Transition, inevitable. Snowflakes left in her trail, she is the speaks with nothing but the wisest to say. She has done her duty, deserves an Oscar for the part she plays. She is fueled by the star of the night, she is the light of day. She is a gift and she is precious, a jewel...a stone. A scent so pure you couldn't capture it in your prettiest bottle and sell it. She is an expert in her field, professional in her own right. Check the resume, she is a vision. Truly a remarkable sight. Not be discouraged or let astray. As each dream unfolds, she thanks God for the day. Some believe courtship is dead, she laughs mockingly, winking an ever confident yeah right. The daintiest solider, with the deadliest fight. Her bark always masking the strength of her bite. She is lady, diva, woman, daughter and healer to be. She is all that one is not and everything one can never be. Never before seen, so none are equipped to handle her. He head on straight, her heart in tow. She steps with purpose. She provides unselfishly. She is ever optimistic but far from naive. Foreign traveler, landing in this place. She ignites a fire while forever keeping her cool. Everything to gain, dismissing the rules. Blazing a trail all her own. Do enjoy the reign, the Queen has taken her thrown.

I wanted to Call

I wanted to call but my heart wouldn't let me. See I keep locked it in my chest, not on my sleeve. I wanted to call. Had to have thought about it 1,000 times. Had to have started to dial at least 1,001. Thinking bout dats how many times you make me cum. Our escapades are always fun. Quite the adventurous one. Yet that does not a reason to call make. I go over it so many times inside, it begins to ache. And when I begin to break, just have to walk away...I go to purple or orange before to black I fade. I wanted to call, but before this butterfly turns gray, I had to say: no never mind, no not tonight. What's the odd he'd even answer, let alone come rushing to your side. See for those very reasons I said no. I decided to do a mani/pedi and experiment with more colors. I normally wouldn't mix, keep it simple and plain. Now I got cuddle pink on my toes and honeystar yellow nails, I'll only be this age once...so I say what the hell. I wanted to call but what the heck for...I didn't expect you to talk for too long, that's if you even answered. I wanted to call and hear your voice. I wanted you to soothe me and compliment me, uplift and reassure me. I wanted to hear you talk nasty and call me your queen. I wanted all the things, I knew the conversation would not be. We used to talk the same language, now your tongue is foreign to me. The words don't sound the same. Can't pick up the dialect. I've even tried sign language, put it right in front your face. But I'm bout ready to disconnect, for fear of time being wasted. I wanted to call and the conversation to lead to kisses, but here I am and your lips I do not taste. Here I am and here I wait. Seems that is all I do. I wanted to call, but I can't keep waiting on you. I wanted to hear your words, whisper softly in my ear. I wanted to breathe in your baritone and smell the taste of your laugh. I wanted all the things, I knew I could not have. I wanted to call, dear friend, trust me when I say. I wanted to call suga baby and be hugged up tight in whatever it was you may have wanted to say. You got me so confused, all I know is I gotta stop wanting you that you way. I wanted to call you and while wanting I imagined conversations like we had in the beginning. I wanted to call and feel you want me that way again. I wanted to call and I wanted to be cool and show no emotion. I wanted to call and play dumb to the commotion. that wreaks havoc in my head and in my chest. I wanted to call but at that time I wanted nothing but the best. Guess most would call it selfish. I wanted to call and I wanted it to be all about me. I wanted to be on the receiving end of what you once spoiled me with. I wanted it better than ever, man I sure am ruined! I wanted to call but I knew it wouldn't turn out like I wanted. I wanted to talk to you only, so on all the others I fronted. I played and dismissed and ignore the efforts. I wanted to call you, but then I wasn't to sure about it. I wanted to call and let your conversation arouse me like your kiss. I wanted to call and be lost in the fairytale of you. I wanted my ever after and I wanted to be rescued. I wanted to call and hear Baby I understand, Lady it will OK. I wanted to hear you'll always be there and all the other "right" things to say. I wanted to pick up the phone and hear you on the other end. But I was busy getting used to...us being... just friends

Koibumi (Love Letter)

Dearest love. Mon Cherie. Je T'aime, moi jolie'nfant. Koi ni ochiru. Mi amor. I just wanted to thank you for loving me the way you do. Holding me in your arms. Protecting me, nurturing my heart. You are a warm robe for my soul. You embody all that is and all that can be. I see possibility in your eyes. It gives me hope, when I question our longevity. Thank you for only seeing me, even when we are in a room full of beauties. Thank you for giving me confidence that I can proudly wear. Thank you for the compliments, when I am sick, angry or just being shitty. Thank you for showing me what trust is. Thank you for surprising me with breakfast in bed and thanks for hitting snooze on the alarm clock...knowing when I need it. Thanks for encouraging me to get up out of bed; run girl...let's get it. Thanks for tucking me in at night and cuddling. Thanks for holding my hand as we walk down the street or sit in the car. Thanks for telling me my miniskirt looked great with those heels. Thanks for getting it on with me in the dressing room and the public bathroom and the park. Thanks for plottin and planning. Sneaking your way to somewhere you knew I would be...and even though I hadn't yet arrived, I walked in to find you waiting on me. Thank you for lunch and the morning massages after I jog. Thanks for making my morning cup of tea. Thanks for church, thanks for being a mentor and volunteering. Thanks for following up with that email for me, you know I be all over the place. And thanks for making that phone call I was dreading. I can handle it, but thanks for the assistance. Thanks for letting me know I am still superwoman, even if you are helping me. You do it because I am so super and because you want to give me a break. Thanks for notes, they are better than greeting cards. I love how you leave them everywhere. I like that you put the date and time in the corner, it takes me back: maybe I was being mean or neglecting his needs that day and yet he still thought to do this for me. It reminds me of the great sex we had that morning or the fabulous dinner you prepared the night before. And it's so cute, that you are so clever, sometimes the date and time let me see how long it took me to find it. Even if I am away on business, they are folded up in the clothes I packed (still haven't figured out how you get the time to do that) or somewhere buried in the many pockets of the suitcase. You have even been so kind, to leave messages at the front desk or awake me calling, playing my favorite song. You've sung to me on my voice mail and even when we make love. I love our lil games. Our secret language and top secret codes. We even got our own handshake. I love you, I thank you. I respect you. I applaud you for dealing with me. Thanks for helping me with that math problem I couldn't figure out. Thanks for being patient, even when I begin to shout. Thanks for always being understanding and never condescending about my tears, my reasoning, my logic...thanks for forcing a smile to my lips when all I want to is pout. Thanks for encouraging my emotions be it anger or disappointment. Thanks for reminding me that God just sees fit for me to go thru it. Thanks for praying with me and reminding me to say my grace. Thanks for dealing with all my mood swings and me being flat out crazy. Thanks for thinking the quirky is sexy and ain't nothing wrong with my being clumsy. Thank you for loving me like a goddess...your Egyptian Pharisee. Thank you for treating me like only a man of God can. Thank you for holding me the most high. Thank you for always telling me the truth. Thank you for keeping a full supply of candles in the house and picking up my favorite shower gel, when you've notice I've gotten low. Thanks for picking up that adorable dress you noticed walking past my favorite store(s). Thanks for introducing me to new perfumes...so maybe now I'll stop spraying your cologne. When you're not around sometimes I want to smell like you and your scent keeps you close. I want to wear you on me always, so over my skin you linger. Thanks for picking up me up some new panties...all styles, cut and colors you know I like variety. Especially when you know I spend more on undergarments and shoes, than actual clothes. I know carrying those lil pink and yellow bags aren't very masculine. Thanks for surprising me with trinkets, tucked in little blue boxes. Thanks for helping pick out my makeup...I like you liking what you're seeing. Thanks for picking up my tampons without the slightest flinch. Thanks for being my man. Thanks for being my best friend. Thanks for listening to me and remembering everyone's name. You know all my girls, their men and their situations...you know all my coworkers and all their business; you even know the names and plots to the characters in my books. You play your video games, work out and sometimes I get to spot you. We always end up sexing, so I don't know why you insist that I do;) You rarely go out with the fellas, most of the time you just study. But even when you do, I know you are faithful to me. So I get to run with the ladies and have no fear or shame. I am glad you are man. Thanks for being my king. I get to where my crazy clothes, a style that can't be tamed. I get write my poetry, read my books, study and I get to have you who gets it. You can really understand me. Thanks for opening your eyes, to what no one but you can see. You tutor me in math, I rewrite your papers for English. It's adorable how you try, definitely an A for effort; but you stick the figures, when it comes to the words, let me be the expert. We laugh, we fuss. We fuck, we play. We don't speak then five minutes later, there's echoing laughter again. We eat and pray. We keep it unbreakable in these dying days. The end is near, and should we not make it to tomorrow; they'll find me curled on your chest, wrapped in your arms. Or my head on your shoulder from the passenger seat. I am at your side. Everyday evermore your bitch! Forever your Queen! Promise you even more and everything in between. Thanks for the PDA. You know I'm wild. I get you so lost in our world we don't even notice. How we ended up in the backseat, somewhere pulled over, asking each other where our clothes at? It's so funny the passion and power we possess. Phenomenal is an understatement; we are truly blessed! So as I write these words, upon these pages and bestow a many thank yous to you. I am also thanking and praising God for joining together us two.

Some UnHoly War

"If my man was fighting some unholy war. I would stand beside him" I would sew closed his bullet holes and apply ice to his swelling. I would nurse his bruises and dress his scrapes. I would cater to the wounded ego and the scratches that were made upon his soul. I would restore bravery, when his spirits grows cold and shaky. I will wed him when he questions my motives. I will back him, when he ponders over my loyalty. Making love on the battlefield...such a naughty queen. I will prove that with me at his side and his gun in holster, we will prevail. I'll see to it, you get heaven even after walking thru hell. He will conquer. With me as his queen, I will mold his empire. Birth him a mighty legacy. If my man had any doubt in his own, I will pick up the slack. When he feels there is something he may lack...with all I possess, he will know I have his back. I will write to him daily when he is away. My words so help me, be vivid even more so than the brightest colors, reaching his soul from the page. I will run the home front, keeping the dynasty safe. When the palace should find its walls without its king. I will keep it on lock. All hail the queen. The villagers will come to my council and keep me in good company. They are my equals not my subservients, and together we will fight the enemy. Should my partner in crime, find himself on the other side, of the mighty kingdom gates. The land will still flourish, a good harvest will still bless us. If my man is off protecting all in which we believe...he will win every battle...encouraged by making it home to me. It will take his sternest hand and his sharpest tongue. To keep me out armor and off the battlefield amongst the rest of them. We women left behind will fight the war with our minds. Drafting treaties and sending out missionaries. Breaking down one issue at time. Having them weakened, lost in the lust of our concubines and in the words of our priests, scholars and visionaries. Undoubtedly victories, never underestimate that which is She. That which is I. Never doubt the power of prayer, it is the shield which protects him. It is the winds upon his back and over the heads of all his men. He is their fearless leader, yet he humbles himself amongst them. He carries the sword I had designed just for his hands. I have a matching dagger that I keep tucked beneath my garments. My father taught me archery and my brother taught me fencing, packed full of deadly secrets. When it comes to the chain, I am the strongest link. Trained in the art of war, and he stills wonders why I am so much like him. I am woman, darling...made from your rib. If my man was fighting some unholy war, I would be the star that navigates his army. I would be the amulet of protection around his neck; in his pocket it is I he carries. I will raise the children smart and strong so that if ever faced with a battle all they're own, they will have the wealth of self only bestowed upon the Spartans. Saved only for the gods...if my man was fighting...I will be at his left arm, for he holds his weapon in his right. If my man was fighting, I would kiss those scars left behind. I would be the peace after the storm, the rainbow for his mind. Upon my breasts rest jewels and perfumes that he picked out. I will show my gratitude by keeping in tact his house. Respect and honor, like jasmine and Lilly. If my man was fighting, in his heart you will find me. Next to the passion and determination to forge on. I will give speeches to motivate his men, that all of your dear ladies wait; so please keep going. We will hold it down while you are away and be waiting should you send for us. We will assemble an army of own, should the enemy attempt to descend upon us. Make haste and win this thing, your descendants depend upon...your victory. Dear love if you are fighting...hear the words of your queen. Take heed to what I speak. If my man was fighting, he would never be alone, he will always have God, next in line is me.

Instant Replay

Blowing shotgun kisses, going straight to the brain. ,My pulse speeds up as your touch goes racing thru my veins. I shiver and can't breathe, it's like shockwaves. Like I am suffering from an overdose, I need a you intervention. It's listening beyond the words and moving deeper than the rhythm. Hearing the ad libs intertwined with the beat. Understanding the meaning of depth. I admire your courage, going beyond the surface. You bring forth everything they sing about. Bring life to R&B. I see you. Even when I turn the other cheek. You bring it back like a lost signal, retrieved. Regained, and how profound. When others dropped the ball, you recovered the rebound. You're mission is to rebuild the great wall that is I. I am a temple, I light up your sky. When I turned away, you intercepted. A kind, no, you wouldn't accept it. When the opponent wasn't payin attention, you crossed up and crossed ova. Showing me a different side of the game. I like the way you play. You have always been right here, cheering me on. Coaching me along, you know how to keep me going. Now, I ain't afraid to admit, that I had it figured all wrong.It's been you, sweet darling, who personify the love songs. You got your shit, but still proceed with no fear. Past nor future, has any room to interfere. We going make it together, see this season thru to the end. We going for the rock, the end comes with conquering the championships. With this ball, winner take all. So much like I, yet everyday a surprise. To the victor go the spoils. I can feel it in your kiss and hear the angels when we lock eyes. Keep doing what you doing....wearing nothing but my whistle tonight

Nightly

You once lit me like lightening on a midsummer's night. Once upon a kiss, once upon a time. You once beckoned me in whispers. Come here, I heard your heart say. You soul requested, for a while fair maiden please stay. Sit down and just relax. On my high heeled open toes, you undid the straps. Slowly slid them down them my legs. Removed the shoes, then slid you hands back up my calves. New fantacies unfurl, ones I didn't even know I had. Planted kisses from my toes up. I knew exactly what was happening, and I knew I didn't want it to stop. Took your time on my thighs. Blindfolded me. Flipped me over and tasted my nectar drip-drops from behind. Planted kisses and little nibbles on my backside. Make me speak in tongues, make my eyes roll. Pin me down and try to make it come out the other side. Spread me wide. Make my pretty toes curl. Make me call out, make me shout. Make me whimper, make me cry. Our sessions rival the crackling of thunder. Make me rumble. Before you, I shatter to pieces. Stuck in this season. Can't see past you. This ain't nothin, but our twice a day ritual. So kismet, so tribal. So animalistic. Make me only knowledgeable of you, eraser of all logic. You can play Dean and I the naughty Valedictorian. Teach, what you see fit I learn. Tomorrow I'll be your TA and assist with the curriculum. Make me glow, I'll be your private porn star. Lights, camera, candles, go! Make me your virgin whore. For this I burn. For you she yearns. I've dreamed of a love easy and didn't know he'd look like you. I've passed over dozens and been a fool for a few. And just like the rest, almost exactly like the others, you were gone when the wind blew. I was out that day and didn't get the memo. Boom is all I heard, that was when the thunder hit and oh shit. Take cover before the lightening strikes. Too late and now all i remember is how you lit me up one evening in the spring. Once upon a kiss. Once upon a time.

Single. Sexy and free.

Hello single lady. Hey diva in the park. Sexy chica in the office. Beauty at the gym. I see you, even when nobody else does. It can be a real drag...being extra cute and nobody being around to see. Of you course, you do it for self...because that's what you like to see looking back at you when you look in the mirror. But damn, sometimes it almost feels pointless. Prim and proper. A pure vision and not a hair out of place. Made up to the tee...sometimes you take yourself out, because you look too adorable not to be seen. Why deny the public the privilege to feast their eyes upon such a sight. Sometimes you feel real blah at the tragedy of it all. Sexy new panties, no one to take them off. Georgeos new shoes, not one to prance around wearing only that for. That amazing way your hair looks, when no one is around to see. You ain't going look this good forever, and while gravity is still on your side, you want someone to witness this. You want someone to admire it all. Such a canvas, so grandly painted and yet no one even stops by the exhibit. It's like you can tell you self all day, everyday how good you look. How great you smell. Sometimes, you just want to hear it from someone other than your girlfriends. I don't know what's worse. Having someone around and not getting the compliments or not having any around at all to notice. Some women, have someone. And their someone neglects their needs and wants as a person, as a lady, as a female and as their partner. Some women, have no one in sight for miles and miles and would like it very much to just be noticed. Not so much seen or a need for attention, just hey, you look very pretty today. Or nice outfit. Something, anything. Sometimes a lil extra effort would be nice. Say if you are seeing someone...a lil surprise visit, perhaps a lil extra time. Maybe something out of the ordinary. It's a sad sight, watching a butterfly turn gray. Loosing it's colors, fading away. There's nothing like seeing a woman, so well put together, looking perfect...but plagued with sadness. Hey there, loney girl, perk up. Hold you head high. Let those curls blow in the wind. Do not weep or walk around with your head lowered; keep those eyes to the sky. Chin up...fear not the loney. Find joy in being alone. It can be quite comforting. Sure one will get tired of telling yourself all the stuff you wish someone else will say. I promise you if you keep your spirit strong, he will find you one day. Don't walk around pouty with your shoulders slumped. Stand up straight, keep it together. Cry when you are alone. Maintain your strenght. It can get old, being alone. I promise you it will get better. It will get easier. It ain't all roses, can't be sunny all the time. There will be days, that it just sucks. You just huff and puff and can't find any joy or satisfaction. That's just life. Moments like that make you all the more appreciative upon receipt of what you desire. It's keeps you humble, keeps you grounded. Sometimes you get mad because you are getting toooooooo much attention from any man who crosses your path. You wonder if you smell like you're in heat or something. Is there a target or bulls eye looming above you that you can't see. Sometimes it can be frustrated and overwhelming, you just want to be left alone like the celebrities...but every man within a 20 miles radius gravitates toward you like the paparazzi. So there has to be balance. You can be on fire 24/7 but your flame may not always be as big. Use the down time to bury yourself deeper in yourself. Surely there is something else you could be doing to better your already fabulous self. So get it, right away. You might just get what you what...being too busy to notice that you didn't have it.

Create

Feel the sadness. Mask not, nor delay. Wear it on the inside. Own it on the outside. Fault not your own. And even when so, feel the hurt. Go thru it to get over it. Throw giggles over your shoulder and caution to the wind. Coo when you speak, and always be polite. Listen and weed out simultaneously. Know when it's real versus just some more dirty laundry. Tap into the unknown, fear not what you may unleash. Be aware when the angels try to guide you. Listen when God speaks. Trust your gut. Logic and reason will run circles around each other. Burn your candles. Take your baths. Do your hair. Paint your nails. Cry your tears. No one is immune to bullshit...it doesn't discriminate. Be bad. Be free. Be good, wholesome and ladylike. Demand your respect. Take what is yours. Claim your position. Take your vitamins, drink your water and eat your yogurt. Each your veggies and the fruit. Read, learn, grow. Find your signature and leave your mark. The world is your canvas and life is an art. Do for you, even when it burns. Even when you're tired. Play your music loud. Dance. Find your rhythm. Chant, stretch, bend, play with crystals and prisms. Go deeper, even you are scared. Say goodbye, even when it hurts. Stand up straight and take your deep breaths. Keep going, even when you sweat. Especially when you sweat, and begin to shiver. Lady state, holds hostage my lover. Dear mistress of distance, I command you set him free. Relinquish the chains of time, deliver him to me. Dear young daughters of Jerusalem, do not wake nor stir up love until it is ready. How pleasantly it pours from me. I am the river he is the shore. Be not impatient, it cometh on the wings of a comet soon after the war.

Taste

At the point of no return. At the front line with your closest comrades bringing up the rear. With their guns at your back, holding you to your every word. Letting you not falter or give way to fear. Letting you not waiver, knowing God is right here. Battle after battle. Obtained a scar or two. Impossible to wage this war and make it out without a wound. Been just a few moons, since the womb and many more before I lay beneath the sun, well off in a distant time will it be before I lay...engulfed in my winded tomb. So in the meantime...be sure I keep my: Fully loaded; extended clip. Pearl handle, custom made grip. Silver bullets; diamond encrusted, platinum frame. Hairpin trigger; named it Arrow. Fly steady, fly straight. Fly with wind, surprising the distance. Unexpectedly accurate and long. Unknowing just how determined and unknowing just how strong. Raised, poised, posed and steady. Quiet, still, relax, ready. Breathless. Emotional. Palms sweat, clenched teeth. Lost in the calm of a screaming silence. Pulse echoes...from the quiet it drips.

Burn

Tell me you want to know me. Then show what you learn. Take me up a notch. Say you want to feel me. Encourage my sexy. Exploit me. Let's watch us on huge theatre screens. Show me foreign teachings. Learn me a thing or two. Say you want me under you spell. Make me a believer in black magic. Lick twice every inch. Memorize every freckle. Play hide and kiss. Connect the beauty mark. Name constellations. I know you miss it, so prove it and show me how much. Create earthquakes, make me quiver at your touch. Pull out all the stops...all your trinkets, tricks, and stunts. Pull out all the toppings, all the fruit and forget not the handcuffs. This worldly girl is tough. Me like it nice and rough. Slow and fast. If it's over real quick...round two betta last. Tie me to the bed and tickle me with your tongue. Make me remember why I thought you were the one. Suck my toes and make it hot. Challenge...ooooopppps did I call you out. Not stoppin til I cry and you shout. My name, you scream out...make me say ouch. Please remember to take your time. Don't rush these moments, push past limits and get it right. Fuck me good, while making love to my mind. Be the words in this journal I write. Slay me. Take me. Keep her, sweet keeper. Leave a sour taste in my mouth. Be the motivation behind the madness. Spark my lust and the reason for the sadness. Bring the steam and make me rain. Spark the torch...I am your flame.

Like no Other

New R&B bumpin in the background. My mouth is silent...the thoughts resound. The ricochetting rain soothes. In here, I can remove my veil of cool. The lady can rest and the queen, although forever crowned, is allowed to de-thrown. Here I can get throwed, served and tossed up. Here, she take off her heels and take off her armor. In here, the air is crisp and here her dainty can breathe. Her tears are dried and her mind is tipsy. Here she can play and just be. Her smile is smeared and her clothing, even ruffled, still appears in tact. She is a precious stone and in the dark she sparkles. Flawless...there is not a thing she lacks. Her heart is on her sleeve, easily shatters like glass. Her hair is ever feathering, in the slight breeze triggered by her laugh. In here she is a jewel and easy on the eyes like one of a kind marbles. She has come to now what to expect and although it's a tad disappointing. She seeks out the humor and with lessons learned, just keeps on going. She is frozen in optimist ism, refuses to see it in any other light. She is a believer and she believes it is well within her right. Lurking in her realm. She is never trapped, consumed or withheld. For even the strongest of chains could not break her spirit. She is the muse, the talent. A gift. To experience the real things and not some knock off. She will one day get it right, for all the times she got it wrong. She hears heart song and quietly hums its melody. She will one day bask in the love that is like none that came before it. She will love him royally, as a whole, in complete totality. Not like yours or hers or the wat he felt about her. Not like she felt about him or the others she thought was it. She will know the next time, Father will see to it. She can almost be sure of it. Not like an other example...it will truly be unique. Move smarter. Grow wiser. Come, closer. One that breaks the mold. It will be the most beautiful of them all, like nothing ever told. Pussssshhhhhhhhh further. Go beyond what you know. For this daughter, send not forth a man until he is truly like no other.

I see you

Hey there. Hello and how are you? I noticed you were watching me. Waiting in the wind. I had a feeling you were looking for me. Sorry, don't know where my head has been. I get a lil lost now and then. A lil caught up now and again. Oh yeah, been really busy; ya know I've been wandering around, casually passing the time. Glad you came to the rescue, some of your wanna-bes have been really unkind. I knew it wouldn't be much longer...I heard you coming. I thought I recognized the scent. I am thrilled to pieces that you were able to make it. Don't take that long again. I still taste your flavors. You linger over my flesh. I am one with you and you are actually right on time. Taken any longer and for sure, I would've lost my mind. I have been watching the rain and collecting the drops. I've been tasting the fire that burns in the sky. I've been a good girl. Done with all my chores. I am ready to go out and play. Can't promise I will make it home before dark...might even break curfew. That's why we work...I can't conform and you are the rules. Opposites are proven magnets and now I am your habit. Slayer on my heels, I dodge your dagger. Shot me like a bullet and scar me like a tattoo. I will keep running as long as I am being chased by you. It's a hunger, unsettling...it's unfathomable...this hot pursuit. You are the blue flame and I a summer's rain. You are the desired fortune and I am the craved flame. I can't deny that there is no introduction needed. I can feel it when you're near. My heart beats it. My dreams paint it and even when I deliberately ignore...you are always there. Haunting and stalking...staring and stripping me with your eyes. I felt the kisses that left the hickey on my shoulder while I slept. I heard your thanking for me as I rested upon your chest. You caught me that time, but I managed to get away again. You, ole trickster. Practical joker. You devilish prankster, ole funny. Back to make a mockery. But not this time love. I won't let you get me. Won't let you win. Won't let you inside. There has not been a time during this tug of war, that I have felt you played fair. So I'm evening up the score...beating the odds and not even going there. I won't have it. Na uh...not this time. I'm out doing me, living my life. I'm holding my own and making some real power moves. Uh uh, no way love...not this time...got no room for you. You always jar my axis, disrupt my groove. Once, well that's ok...never twice the fool. That I just won't do. No falling here, feet planted firmly on the ground. Standing in tree or better yet warrior, so as if for this affair, love, you and I are over.

Rare Herbs

Mystic. Gypsy. Witch. Goddess. Diva. Queen, Princess and Duchess. Yogi. Daring. Misfit. Bossy and Unique. Icy. Racy. Giving. Nurturing. Kind. Humble. Charismatic. Trouble. Rake. Dandy. All of the above and everything in between. Alpha. Star. Creator. Dreamer. Keeper. Snorer. Bad Singer. Clumsy. Goofy. Silly. Witty. Wordly. Girly. Priss. Bitch. Lovely Dancer. Believer. Seductress. Temptress. Free spirit. Music's lyrics. Seasons. Butterfly. Third eye. Pituitary. Root of all...! Angel. Special. She-devil. Tiger's eye. Brave. Lover of language. Manipulator of words. Bad speller. Soar the skies with the grace of a bird. Leaving fairy dust behind. Body indescribable. Even more so, the mind. Of she who is so kissable and lovable. Rambunctious and untamable. Children look in her eyes and see their reflection. Youthful and exuberant. Radiating an aura of love and joy. Noble, delicate. Strong and multi-faceted. Uncapturable. Unrealistic. Majestic. Generous. Optimistic. Pocketful of sunshine. It rains when she cries. See her in a shooting star or in the glitters of light from prism. Diamond, the flower blooming from chaos. The pixie of never never land. Playing rough. Built tough. Ever fair. A being so precious and so rare. Exquisite. Elegant and eloquent. In the air you can feel her essence. There is a scent of passion when in her presence. For even if cannot see, you can know for certain when she is there. Enjoy her gifts while you can. Before poof! you've blinked and she's disappeared.

Bliss Tastes Like...???

One red rose crosses stems with one pink rose. Both dried keepsakes. Resting, nestled next to three melon tea candles. New found like of purple as a result of an experimental nail polish. Thank God for trying new things. Just might like it. Thank God for meeting new people. Just might end up lovin' them. Peace come in and self indulgence take over. Spoiled by self. Adored by self. It's all for the taking and upon taking it all in, take none of it for granted. Slowly sippin from a cup; witnessing the day. Ticking with time. Reaper of rhythm. Slayer of those absent a third eye. Marching through life triumphant yet tranquil. Peace be still. Husssshhhhhhhhh; keeper of secrets. Mistress of desire. Life is a fancy, of its pleasures may I never retire. Plush is the fruit; luscious for the picking. No matter what the weather, under the moonlight, may there forever be naked dancing. For even in the midst of the roughest storms, one can still hear the angels singing. A child's smile, a woman's laughter. A girl's innocence, a man's rapture. A lonely tear. An amazing sight. A vision of love. Butterflies flirting and candles lined up to shape your zodiac sign. A new girl friend. Forgiving a past lover. A new revelation. A real pulse racing nightmare. A great dream. These are a few of my favorite things. A clear view of the moon. My favorite love songs. A surprise. Giggles. Tickles. Experiments gone horribly right. Making love til dawn, then all the way to and through the following night.

A Man Scorned

Oh for crying out loud!!!! Helllooooo out there?! What are you men thinking? Are your serious? I mean really. It's not sexy to hide your true feelings. It leaves room to be replaced. It's not sexy to be fake...that will come back to bite you in the ass every time. Sure it can be cute to be mysterious and even a turn on to be slightly unavailable. Play those games for too long and the girl will move on to her next victim. Leaving a trail of broken hearts in her wake. U will be lost in the memory of her lingerie and her scent will haunt you. You will remember the five-hour sessions and great conversations and you will wonder why you ever "dubbed it down" in the first place. Oh yeahhhhh, that's right!!! You feared being hurt and crushed and left out to dry. Yet these are the ways you make her feel. Not to mention all the men that have come before you and done her a terrible injustice. And she still managed to get caught up in you. Ungrateful, unappreciative you. Can someone pleasssssssssssssseeeeeeee tell me why men are the dominant species and yet they are emotional crippled???? Get their lil heart broken once or twice and they want to throw in the towel. Life is but a game and we are players. The pawn is the weakest on the board and the queen is the most powerful. There is only one king. So which one are you? Now not doing for the next because you've tried it before and it didn't work out...well that's a crock of shit. Please tell me how many times does a woman experience heart ache? How many tears does one woman shed? Surely it's not just because we are more "emotional;" even in our most "bitter" state we return to that slaughter house of love over and over again. We jump off that ledge and don't look back. Sure, despite our perfect make-up, new haircuts, and killer outfits, a scar or two may surface. The past can sometimes get in the way. Insecurities can sometimes defer openness. But my heavens, we sure do know how to get over it don't we!! We hurt, we weep. We work, we exercises. We shop, we move on. The world is vast and because so we eventually believe they can't all be scum. You men on the other hand, not so forgiving!!! Get burned, and it's hellfire for any and all who follow. What does it take for a man to let go of his past? Give up the ghost? Seems that men are the new-age scorned and bitter. What's the deal fellas??? Dat bitch Eve ate the apple, not me. Yes a woman ordered the head of John the Baptist on a platter, but not this woman. You want her, but you won't admit it. You miss her but you deny it...won't say it. You love her and you hate it. Karma is real, you betta believe it. Play those games and you will regret the day. You will sit back and remember how her being unavailable, went from intentional: stepping away from her cell, signing off Instant Messenger when she see you get on; to real: she is no where near a phone willing you to call. She put on that lingerie (that she used to wear for you) under a dress (now wearing it all for herself) and hit her favorite dept store in her brand new wedges...and oh no, no reception:( She's not on the computer because again, she is no where near a computer. She is on a date with that great guy she met at the mall while shopping alone (when you should've been there fooling around with her in the dressing room and carrying her bags) or she's out with the girls. Either way, game over, you loose. While being so busy, self centered and neglecting. She is now dancing her way into anew. She was fulfilled before you and since we woman are built with an armor just for disappointment, she is already getting over you. Then the roles reverse. You are now the one replaying her voice mails, you now reread the emails all day everyday. You keep looking at the pix until you get the nerve to DELETE THEM ALL!!!...except that one...and that one. Shame how you were once too busy, too tired, or too sleepy. Funny how you feel when the stiletto is on the other foot. Wish you would've been a lil more open and a lil easier on her. Oh well, c'est la vie. Such a tragedy:( Who knows what could've been, had you kept up the facade that led her your way in the first place. Damn your rep for being better than real thing. Maybe you should take some notes from him. Couldn't hurt. Bet he never gets dismissed. But then again, why would he? He knows how to act. It's all an act, the world is but a stage. Take you place. Shit or get off the pot. Shape up or ship out. She just may forgive you and give you another shot. That's if she has not moved on to her next victim. However if she has, you are but just another broken hearted fool of a man who let her slip through your fingers; when you once had her in the palms of you hand, guess you weren't too good at catching those throws after all. She made the plays but you fouled out. And you now lay in the tracks of her stiletto prints. Haunted by her scent.