Love And I are Breaking Up....Tonight

Sometimes bein cool gives you a headache. Sometimes u just want to be held. Sometimes a look can bring about heart ache. Sometimes u weep silently and the tears falls endlessly. Sometimes being calms sends your body into an eternal uproar. Sometimes you feel the shattering to the core. Sometimes you find the harmony in the silence of the melody. Sometimes everything, is all that you cannot see. Sometimes it's a battle and the load can get heavy...sometimes being humble feels like being hushed. Sometimes you don't want to be considerate or polite. Sometimes you don't want to be a lady or politically correct. You want to sleep extra late and let you hair down. Sometimes you feel lost and want to scream this is a bunch of bullshit. Sometimes you want a one way ticket to your next right of passage. The independent's woman secret desire for love, faith, community, kids and marriage. Queen of the kingdom; that is your man. His body, your territory; his love conquers every inch of your land. Sometimes you want a fairy god mother or a genie or even a guardian angel to grant you a wish. Sometimes you want to stomp and throw things and just say fuck it. Sometimes you want to be made love you on your own terms, not just when its convenient it. Sometimes you can't help but to be so grateful and happy so appreciate of all that it is. Sometimes the greatest love begins with the simplest of friendships. Sometimes you want to say things even if you don't mean it. Sometimes you want whatever at whim, upon your request. Sometimes you get weary and cannot find rest. Sometimes being patient makes you feel like a fool. Sometimes you just need to hear, hey lady you're beautiful.
Ya know being single is grand. It's lovely...quite lovely. Most of the time, but every once in a while; every now and again; there comes these fleeting moments in time. That make you think, maybe it's not so great. It can really suck!!! Yet even then, wipe the tears and wrap yourself up real tight. Be grateful for the times that remind you how to feel. Appreciate being able to recognize what you are waiting for. Be conscious of the present and notice how it ain't that bad. We all want love. To know love. To be loved. To express and represent love. "Oh yee daughters of Jerusalem do not seek or stir up love until it is ready." Love yourself all the ways you wish another would. And when that does not pacify your wanting...DOOOOO something you love. Then feel the pangs of the pain and doubt...disappointment and confusion just lift. Dissipate and evaporate...the lostness gives way to reassurance and confidence. Just as it consumed you, take notice of it leaving. Told you those icky moments were fleeting. Strap up your stilettos and say your prayers. Exercises and have a passion for your work and for this life and the next. Be joyous for all that you have and believe in the infinite possibilities of all that is within your reach. Jai comes in the morning.I know for I am the essence riding in on its light. And yes, even I shed silent tears at night.